Little Things

Considering the number of times people ask me, "What do you find different about living in England?" you'd think I might have formulated some sort of intelligent answer by now, a mini-comedy routine, perhaps, that I could launch into anytime the question arose. But in fact, I am always taken by surprise, and left fumbling for an answer that isn't screamingly obvious, such as driving on the wrong side of the road, better weather or listening to Natasha Kaplinsky read the evening news instead of Katie Couric.

I used to respond to that question with, "Everything," which is perhaps the most accurate answer, but when pressed for details I always came up short. The problem is, the big differences—like the accents and the remarkable and welcomed absence of billboards—blend into the scenery after a time, and the little things—such as diminutive teaspoons, huge plugs on electric appliances and Costa Coffee franchises—become lost amid the minutiae of everyday life.

To counter this, I thought I'd list some of the little things that I see, hear or experience during my daily routine that would not be there if I still lived in America:

     - Thatched cottages: yes, they are as quaint as you think

     - Canal boats: there are more canals in Birmingham than in 
       Venice (yeah, me too)

     - Radio theatre and game shows on BBC radio: after five years, I still 
       have not gotten the hang of British radio, I only listen to it when my wife 
       turns it on

     - The Daily Mail: as mentioned in the Beatles' song, "Paperback Writer"

     - Actually being in Banbury Cross: you know, that place you ride 
       the Cock horse to

     - Likewise, Drury lane: though sad to say, the muffin man has moved

     - Hedgerows: right up there with thatched cottages in terms of traditional, 
       English countryside quaintness

     - Electric kettles: an oddity in American, a basic necessity here

     - Holly bushes: I never saw one in the States, but here they grow like weeds

     - Celsius: just try to get an intelligible temperature reading, or explain 
       to someone what 75 degrees Fahrenheit means

     - Round tea bags with no strings: the Brits are pros when it comes to 
       tea, strings are for wimps

     - Wellington Boots: what would you do without your wellies?

     - Pedestrian paths: the first thing about Britain that I fell in love with, they 
       have special places for pedestrians to walk where cars can't go

     - Right of way: pedestrian paths that run through other people's back 
       yards and they can't do a thing about it

     - Soccer balls: they're everywhere, and even young girls can manoeuvre 
       them around better than I ever could

     - Gum on the sidewalks, roads, pedestrian areas, bus station floors . . .: 
       the young people here chew gum on an Olympic level, and have never 
       been told what a trash can is for.

     - Bureau de Change: there's one on every corner here; I’ve never seen 
       one in the US, but then, why would you need one?

     - Radio Times: in order to find out what's showing on the telly, you have 
       to look in The Radio Times—don't ask me, it's a British thing.

     - Train Spotters: They’re the guys standing at the end of the train platforms 
       with a notebook, camera, thermos of tea and a marked lack of social skills

So there you have it; England at a glance. I still won’t be able to list any next 
time someone asks me, but at least I’ll be able to point them toward this website.