N O R T H   A M E R I C A N   T O U R
9 - 23 October 2004

Toronto

Getting here could have been a much more trying ordeal but, in fact, it wasn't too difficult. Aside from the anticipated balls-up of driving in the dark in a strange car in an unknown city looking for a hotel you don't know the location of after having spent the past 12 hours travelling, it wasn't bad.  And the vacation gods were kind enough to smile upon me as I pulled several stranger-from-out-of-town manoeuvres on the roadways. 

No one was hurt, we're here, all's well.

Breakfast on the first morning reaffirmed the fact that everything is different over here. First of all, we waited an hour in our room before going out to find someplace to eat because "nothing will be open at 7:30 in the morning." When we finally did go down to hunt for food we immediately found a café that had been open since 6:30.

As soon as I sat down, a cup of coffee appeared, and every time the waiter walked by he topped up my cup. I had eggs benedict for breakfast, something I haven't been able to do for nearly three years.  Pure heaven. 

[North Americans 1 : Britain 0]

Breakfast over, we hit the streets to explore. It was a lovely day; the weather was sunny and mild and perfect for exploring this very friendly, clean, attractive and accessible city by foot.

After living in Britain for three years, negotiating the sidewalks was a pleasure. People walking toward you passed by properly, to your left, as they should, with none of this dodging and weaving and constant near-collisions. 

[North America 1 ; Britain 0]

Our aimless rambling soon brought us to the foot of the CN Tower, a magnificent structure--the tallest building in the world (free-standing class). Constructing it was an engineering marvel and conceiving it was pure genius. I would have argued that that putting a big needle on Toronto's waterfront would have resulted in nothing more than an eyesore and a huge waste of money. Instead, it's beautiful, and dominates and defines the city. It has become one of the most visited tourist sites in the world and was declared one of the seven man-made wonders. It was well-thought out, with glass elevators, revolving restaurant, world's highest observation deck, glass floor, cafe, promo movie, etc, etc. And it was completed in just 40 months, whereas the Spinnaker Tower in Portsmouth, which is being built to commemorate the millennium, is now four years over due and millions of pounds over budget. 

[North Americans 1 : Britain 0]

On the other hand, for one of the most visited places on earth, we were subject to a confusing labyrinth giving few clues as to where the entrance actually was. Once located, there were even fewer signs suggesting how one might purchase the proper ticket (there are several tour tiers) and where one might go after buying one. No effort was made to encourage people to form orderly lines and there weren't enough British people in the crowds to tacitly assist by demonstrating, through example, how to queue properly. 

[Britain 1 : North America 0]

The Tower, once we made it up there, was grand. We did all the touristy things, like stand on the glass floor, 'ooh' and 'ah' over the scenic views (which were stunning and practically forced you to say 'ooh' and 'ah') and had a coffee and muffin in the café. It was a pleasant way to spend the morning and we were glad we did, as an afternoon there might not have been so relaxing: on our way out, the lines of people pressing to get in extended way down the labyrinth.

We wandered the streets some more and, around lunchtime, stumbled into a gigantic shopping mall, where we spent hours comparing the shops and noting which ones appeared in British malls and which ones were exclusively North American.

Canada seems to be a crossroads between England and the US. There were brands familiar to us from back in Sussex that I know I won't see in Albany and there are brands I grew up with which my wife has never heard of. Also, there was the fun of seeing familiar packaging but with different brand names on them. Linx deodorant and Finish dishwasher detergent, to name a few, are both called something different here.

Later, we meandered along the boulevards and sat in several scenic parks, enjoying the sunshine, deep blue sky and autumnal trees. I have to say, for all its cleanliness and grandeur, there are an awful lot of homeless people here. The downtown area, where block after block of high-rise office buildings of stunning design and brilliant presence tower over the sidewalks, practically screams affluence. Many of the buildings are mirror plated and positively gleam in the sun; one is actually gold plated and glows magnificently in the dawn light, like a proud beacon of capitalism.

Yet on the streets below, scruffy men and women huddle in doorways or sleep, wrapped in thin blankets, on the air vents in the sidewalks. For the most part, they are benign, not grasping or abusive like some of the homeless we've encountered in Brighton. Only one or two spoke to passers by and they were very polite. Still, being homeless here must be hard work in the winters, where temperatures can plummet to minus 30 and snow is measured in feet, not centimeters.

For the tasteful modern buildings, and having a downtown that doesn't look like it was designed by someone with a vendetta against good taste in general and the city in particular, I give Toronto a point. But for not handling their homeless problem, I call a foul and take it away, so it's no score.

After all that walking, we were ready for a nice dinner but we still weren't prepared for the portion sizes here in North America. We were only able to eat about half of our entrées and felt ashamed at wasting so much food. To their credit, the waitress immediately asked if we wanted it wrapped to take with us. We explained we couldn't as we were staying at a hotel, so the food ended up in the garbage.

I prefer the old British style of serving a reasonable amount of food that you can finish at one sitting. Lately, however, the Brits are beginning to copy the Americans by serving larger and larger portions of food. And as they have not yet cottoned on to the 'doggy bag' concept, even more food is wasted. 

[North America 0 : Britain 0]

Random observations:

Hotels here do not give you the option of reusing your towels; they simply give you new ones every day, which is wasteful. On the other hand, they provide a washcloth. I have no idea why, but no hotel I've stayed at in Britain provides a flannel, or face cloth. I've always found this irritating, while my wife was surprised to find them here, as she had never heard of such a thing. I'm inclined to give a point for the face cloths but take it away for the towels.

Also, while I'm ever so pleased with the power-shower, it occurs to me the shower gadgets in Europe are much more efficient, even if they provide little in the way of water pressure. I'll give a point to North America for having awesome showers but award a point to Europe for being conservation-minded. And for causing an American to give a rat's ass about conservation, I award Europe a second point.

 [Britain 2 : North America 1]

Toronto is also home to The Path, an underground network of tunnels lined with over a thousand shops and cafés. This was installed some time ago due to the harsh winters here. You can walk from building to building and mall to mall without having to expose yourself to sub-zero temperatures.

Toronto's population is extremely diverse. There is a high percentage of Asians--Chinese, Indian, Korean--and English seems to be the least-spoken language judging by overheard conversations. We later learned that Toronto has been recognized (by some organization that thinks itself important enough to recognize such things) as the most culturally diverse major city in the world.

We left Toronto early on a clear morning when the sky was blue and the road wide and open. It was a joy to drive in North America again, where you have a margin for error surrounding even the largest of vehicles and wide shoulders border the ribbon of blacktop, which stretches into the distance as far as you can see. But I won't award any points for this; the hedge-enclosed, narrow lanes winding through the countryside are one of the things that give the UK its character. I wouldn't trade it for anything. But you have to admit, like the Romans, we Americans now how to build roads.

The scenery was spectacular and showed us enough New England autumn to last us a good long while. We didn't mind, this was, after all what we had come for.

The crossing into America was surprisingly stunning. As we crossed the bridge we could see below us the Thousand Islands, scattered like bits of emerald in the wide, blue waters of the St. Lawrence River. I was hoping to find a lay by where we could stop to enjoy the view and take photographs but the single lane bridge was not built for such things. All we could do was take in the view as we drove from the shores of Ontario toward the barriers at the end of the bridge.

Beyond the roadblocks and armed guards, lay America.