F U E R T E V E N T U R A
A (slightly tongue-in-cheek) Adventure
17 - 24 March 2007

Travel -- Saturday, 17 March 2007 12:14 PM

This time, we're on our way to Fuerteventura.  Yeah, I didn't know where it was, either. 

Fuerteventura is one of the Canary Islands, which serve as a sort of Caribbean Paradise for the UK--a quick place to hop to for sun, sand, tropical fun of all types and the opportunity to meet time-share salesmen.  Like many Americans, I had never heard of Fuerteventura, and had no clear idea where the Canary Islands were.  I thought they were near the Bahamas but it turns out they are just 67 miles from the coast of Morocco.  As such, they are off most American's radar and, with the Caribbean Islands warmer, closer and boasting better beaches, I doubt I am going to run into any of my countrymen once we arrive.

It's within small-craft distance from Morocco, as many a hopeful
African Asylum-seeker is all too aware.

Impressions of Travel -- 9:15 PM

Travel is pretty much waiting: Waiting to leave, waiting for the train, waiting in a succession of lines at the airport, waiting in the departure lounge before waiting in the boarding lounge and then waiting on the plane.  We spent ten hours traveling today and only during 4 of them were we actually moving anywhere.

Ways to liven up a boring flight: 
     -- Listen carefully to the safety instructions and, at the appropriate moment, slap your forehead and say, "So that's how those seat belts work!" 
     -- Remind those around you that, if the oxygen supply should fail, the masks falling from the ceiling are simply meant to distract you while you suffocate and die. 
     -- If there is a queue for the toilet, join the end of it, tap the guy in front of you on the shoulder and whisper, "I've got the primer, are you the one with the detonator?" 

Coming to Terms -- Sunday 18 March 7:50 AM 

The most convenient thing about Fuerteventura so far is the weather.  Although a climate Mecca for Brits, temps in the seventies, to me, are merely comfortable.  This allows me to wear a jacket, which provides storage space for my camera and cigar paraphernalia, 

The Dunas Club Apartments

Our chosen accommodation--The Dunas Club Apartments--is suitably located close to the center of town, allowing us easy access to beaches, shopping, restaurants and, should we desire it, public transportation.  It is, however, more chronologically challenged than some of the other tourist compounds scattered about the island and therefore contains some, shall we say, surprises. 

First of all, we are in an apartment that sleeps four but, because there are only two of us, we had to pay extra for 'under occupancy.'  I had never heard of this concept before and I have to say it rankled me a bit, especially when I finally saw the place.  It is spacious, if your idea of spacious is cozying up with your roommate.  Granted, there is an adequate living room/kitchen area, a suitable balcony with cheap plastic chairs and a tiny, unstable table, a good sized bathroom and a double bedroom, but I am hard-pressed trying to come up with three other people I would choose to spend seven days in such confined quarters with.  I do not now, nor have I ever, had friends I was that close to, and when you consider having to deal with toothpaste tubes left open, wet towels draped around the bathroom, dirty clothing heaped in the corners and empty beer cans cluttering up every flat surface in the apartment, the extra fee begins to sound like a bargain. 

Additionally, in getting ready for our first day of this tourist extravaganza, I found the shower brace broken and the showerhead hanging down, pointing at the wall.  Later, I found out that, while the showerhead was spraying at the wall instead of on me, most of the water ran onto the bathroom floor. 

An impressive mirror is affixed to the wall above the sink but, with no exhaust fan, it is impossible to see anything in it, and when I went to wipe it down it swung violently from side to side.  I managed to keep it on the wall but I think I'll use the mirror in the bedroom from here on. 

Otherwise, the place is clean and tasteful in an "everything bought at Cargo* (the British Target) in 1996" sort of way. The mattress is as comfortable as a prison bunk and signs of cheap-and-dirty workmanship and the unfortunate effects of settling abound. 

Still, and I must stress this, it's pleasant.  Despite the constant breeze, the weather is agreeable, the food options are plentiful and cheap and the pool below is big, blue and inviting.  You really could do worse for the money. 

This morning, we need to forage for supplies.  My wife just got up.  I recommended she take a bath but now she's saying there is no way she's going to take a bath with her knees tucked under her chin in that diminutive excuse for a tub.  I guess I'd better go see if I can fix the shower bracket. 

Surveying the Dunas Domain -- 3:36 PM 

I'm sitting on the balcony enjoying (surprise, surprise) a tasty beverage, nice Cuban cigar and an interesting view of the pool area.  The beaches, I understand, are all clothing-optional and, from the look of things down below, no one much cares what you don't wear while sunbathing around the pool, either.

The pool - very inviting until you take the wind into account

This isn't really as impressive as it sounds; the clientele at The Dunas Club Apartments seems to favor pensioners, and clothing was invented for a reason.

I'm currently grateful for clothing, as it's a bit cool up here.  The pool is sheltered from the breeze and enjoys the sun while our north-facing apartment is in constant shade and exposed to constant wind, so it's excusable that I'm dressed in a jacket and jeans while people below me are wearing nothing more than a thong. 

Naked sunbathing is allowed, although the weather discourages it;
 you can see how cold it is.

We had a lovely stroll through the town and along the local beach today.  For a manufactured community, it's a bustling little place.  Mostly it's filled with restaurants, clubs, bars, and whatnot shops designed to part the tourists from their Euros.  Since we'll be eating out a lot, we checked out some of the restaurants.  Originally, we'd planned to cook a few meals in our apartment but some of the other 'surprises' we discovered while trying to prepare a simple lunch were the two burners, microwave and toaster they expect you prepare meals on and the cunning manning in which they hide the sink beneath the hot water heater.  This place is advertised as 'self-catering,' but they obviously don't expect you to do a lot of cooking in here. 

The Front, packed with bars, restaurants and trinket shops.

But the local fare is both tasty and inexpensive.  When you look at a menu, you think, "Wow, that's cheap." and then when you realize the prices are in euros, not pounds, you think, "Wow, that's really cheap!"  On our first evening, we had a tapas meal of grilled sardines and Canarian potatoes with wine (we were feeling quite continental until we realized what we had ordered was, in effect, fish and chips) for just €14, or about £9.50 (or $18.60).  And breakfast this morning, for the two of us, was about £5. 

It's getting late now.  The people down below are starting to get dressed and drift back to their rooms.  Time to chill out for a bit before heading out it search of dinner. 

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